When the Goddess of the Dead Saved My Life 💐

Let me tell you the story of when the Goddess of the Dead saved my life. 

It was April 2020 and I had just dedicated myself to the goddess Persephone after experiencing Her call for over a year. I was making queer friends and finding community at my local CUUPS group. My life seemed hopeful for the first time since I came out at Catholic school. 

And then the pandemic hit. 

When the world went into lockdown, I sat on the steps in my grandmother’s nightgown and cried until my nose bled. The economy tanked; new COVID cases rose every day. My school play was cancelled after I scored a lead role. My classmates and I attended school on Zoom- then we reached spring break and there was no school at all. 

Like many teens in my generation, I have seen the darkness and fought my way back into the light. I won’t describe the downward spiral that I experienced- whatever you’re imagining, other youth and I have lived through it. 

At my lowest point, my mom took me for a drive through the countryside. We parked outside an empty Christian church and sat in the grass beneath the gray sky. In the eerie calmness, I felt the invisible hand of a god brush my shoulder. 

A black vulture landed on a telephone wire and fixed his beady eyes on me. I waved hello and two more appeared. Then ten vultures, fifteen, twenty. They flapped their dark wings and gazed down like a court of silent judges.

I laughed out loud at their bald heads and clumsy bodies. And for the first time in weeks, I felt perfectly at peace. 

I decided to hold on. 

Humans have been fascinated with these death-consuming birds since Neolithic times. Vultures get a bad rep today, but historically they’ve been viewed as symbols of rebirth across world religions. In Egypt, they were sacred to the guardian goddess Nekhbet. To the Maya, they were a sign of renewal, avian messengers who carried communications between the earth and the heavens. 

There’s no ancient association between Persephone and  vultures. My experience is pure UPG (unverified personal gnosis). But those birds reminded me of the inevitability of rebirth. They reminded me of how much I have to live for. I don’t believe in “God’s plan” or a universal destiny, but I believe that Persephone has plans for me. And I plan on becoming Her priestess. 

If you’re going through a rough time, hold on. The black vultures are watching you from the sky.